the girl at the gym totally vibes me.
anyways. haven't blogged in almost two weeks or so. been busy. the wednesday after i last blogged i got to do a little teaching at church. and by teaching, i mean i shared my heart and proved that i'm a big crybaby. it was good though. i felt like a connected to some people and let them know that they're not alone and that they can make it.
i bet you can't guess where i'm at. thats right shoals hospital at 3am. thats my life for now i guess. God's been good to me. i'm getting alot of hours and getting a very nice amp is very much possible and very soon. its gonna take hard work and discipline but i should be getting one of those new vox ac30 handwired pretty amps. i'm so stoaked.
this week i started writing my book. lots of people told me all at about the same time that i should write my stories down, so i took their advice. i started my book. i'm really excited to be writing again. i'm pretty much telling all the awkward and strange stories of my dating life. such as the first kiss, the pee story, and maybe even the i heard the girl pee story. i'm pretty sure it'll make most people laugh and offend some. if it actually gets read, i might even try to get some stupid publisher to pick it up. not really worried about it though.
i go wednesday to sign up for singing lessons. i'm pretty excited. hopefully i'll learn how to sing and you know, be able to do what i dream of doing. well, other than last nights dream.
last night i dreamed about me getting married. the girl look simliar to a girl i actually knew but it wasn't her. she was a beautiful brunette and loved me. i so vividly remember me being nervous because this was the big day that i was waiting for my whole life. once i was in those shoes it didn't feel like i thought it would though. i felt shy, unstable and vulnerable. the lighting in the dream was weird. it felt like those old time photos you get taken in gatlinburg.
in the dream i loved the girl and wanted to spend my whole life with her but i was so afraid. i knew that i was no longer responsible for just me that i had her i had to protect and support and make sure that her dreams came true. i also had to make sure i kept myself in check because no one wants a crappy husband. thats why i woke up stressed out more than i ever have in my life. so stressed i went to my parents house for pancakes. but i only got french toast sticks. sad day
but i don't wanna get married anymore. at least til next week. any ways i know this is the worst post ever but i just wanted to update you fellas on my life.
peace out.
ps. she really wants to be momma bear
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